I’ve decided that I will smile, not cry, while writing this.
Right now, you are sleeping next to me so peacefully. In fact, you are so close that you are underneath my arm and completely leaning into me with no room between us, much like you’ve been doing the last 6 weeks.
Where did they go?
I go back to work this week and as happy as I am that your daddy will be home with you from now on, I will miss spending all day with you.
I will admit, the beginning was tough. I was in a lot of pain and we were just getting to know one another. It felt like you ate ALL THE TIME and that I was never going to get up from the couch…like EVER, but you were doing what you needed to in order to grow and I just had to provide you with everything you needed. Daddy was home for the first two weeks and he made sure I was fed so that I could make sure you were fed. When I couldn’t move that much, Daddy held you and changed you and loved you.
Every day was different and so was every night. You kept us on our toes, that’s for sure. I would get sad when you cried and I didn’t know what you wanted. I would get mad at myself for getting frustrated when you would cry after I had done everything I could think of for you. But when I would see you sleeping peacefully the next day, I would forget everything and just be happy.
My heart melts every time you smile and it was fun watching you transition from smiling because of gas in the beginning to smiling because I sang a funny song. It’s good to know someone out there thinks I’m funny
Your little “talking” sounds make all the crying sounds worth it. “Tummy time” has been one of my favorite times each day and I think it’s one of your favorite times too, because you immediately start making happy sounds and trying to move around. You start to kick your little feet and with a little help, you even start to move forward a little. We’ll have to start childproofing the house soon!
You even started reaching for your toys last night in your bouncy chair and you were doing it all on your own. You are already becoming an independent little man!
You’ve grown so much in this short amount of time, and while I am so excited for you to grow and learn, I hope I don’t miss too many milestones from being away during the day. I know Daddy will keep me updated with plenty of photos and videos! I look forward to our evenings, weekends, holidays and vacations together as a family.
So please don’t grow up too fast while I’m not there. Although Daddy can be a pretty funny guy, save some smiles and laughs for me too. Even though I’ll be trading in tummy time and those quiet cuddly mornings in bed for rush hour traffic and meetings, there is so much more to look forward to. These past 6 weeks have just been a break from the world and now we’ll settle into our new normal.
And it will be wonderful.